Wednesday, December 25, 2013

10 things that Arab parents do



They're awesome but they can do some odd things at times..

1. They insist on wrapping the TV remote controls in cling film.  

2. They break an egg onto new things. This can be anything from a new washing machine to a laptop to a car. If it hasn't been smeared in a bit of raw egg, something bad will happen to it. 

3. If you miss a couple of your mum's calls, she'll convince herself that you're either dead, kidnapped or in a hospital bed somewhere. 

4. They will get offended when you correct their English and continue to use the wrong pronunciation, sometimes I think deliberately.. 

5. They will never let you go to sleepovers or school trips that last longer than a day. 

6. They think it's strange and foreign that someone would ever study anything unrelated to science. And if you do, you might as well not go to university. 

7. They're casually racist and see absolutely nothing wrong with it when you question them about it. Politically correct is not something in their vocabulary.

8. The men love loudly arguing over discussing politics and religion at any kind of get-together.

9. Arab mums make the best food ever. And you best make sure you remind them of this at every dinner.

10. They're about as likely to let you marry a non-Arab as they are to letting you buy a non-German car. Highly unlikely. 

Well, that's just my parents but I'm pretty sure a lot of Arab parents do these things too. Of course this is just a bit of fun - I love them very much :)

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

This date combination won't happen again for another 90 years.

I have nothing to blog about right now, but I obviously have to post something on such a memorable day, so here's a pretty picture :D


...clearly I never got around to getting a life since my last 'exciting date combination' post back on 12/12/12.. 

Sunday, December 8, 2013

"And walk not on the earth with conceit and arrogance. Verily, you can neither rend the earth, nor reach the mountains in height."

[Surat Al-Isra':37]

Random questions tag


Someone left this question tag in the comments section a couple of months ago. Better late than never..?

1. Would you rather be born a Muslim or covert and why? Born Muslim. Reverts sometimes have to deal with their families' not accepting them, and some leave Islam because they find it too intense starting everything at once without any support. I'd rather have Islam as part of my culture and upbringing. Besides, I think all born Muslims reach a point in their life when they have to either accept or reject the religion.  

2. Favourite book that is g-rated (suitable for young) The Harry Potter series.

3. If you won the lottery what would you do with it? Buy property. 

4. Most inspirational Muslimah you know. My mum! She's beautiful.

5. Number 1 thing you cannot leave home without. Keys?

6. Biggest problem faced as a Muslim teen. For me it was actually admitting that I'm a Muslim. That's kind of sad in hindsight.  

7. Coke or Pepsi? Cannot tell the difference. 

8. Chicken or beef? Chicken :P


9. Favourite ice cream flavour. Cookie dough.


10. Cooking or baking? Baking, mainly because I can't cook..


11. Perfect age for marriage (both girl and guy). This is different for everyone but for me it's always 5 years older than my age at any given time.. So 28?


12. Celebrity crush. Don't have one.


13. Christianity or Judaism. In which context..? If it's which one I prefer, they're both religions of Allah (swt) so I don't have a preference. 


14. What would you name your daughter? I'm not married so I haven't thought about baby names.. Plus I don't really want girls! 


15. What would you name your son? I love the name Harith.  


16. Colour that suits all skin tones. All colours suit all skin tones, it's finding the right shade that's important.


17. Your dream car. At the moment it's a hardtop Porsche Boxter. 



18. Characteristics your husband must have. Tall (over 5'9"), intellectual (IQ over 120), successful (over £35,000 PA), older (by 2-8 years), no previous extramarital relationships (0), prays (5 td). It would also be excellent if he does not have a Facebook page.

19. If you could change eye colour, hair colour and skin colour, what colours would you choose? I really like green eyes, but I wouldn't change anything else.

Hope you're all doing well :) 

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Gucci Boston review


It has been more than a year since I bought my Gucci Boston bag so I have decided to review it for anyone thinking of purchasing one. I find these reviews helpful when deciding whether or not to buy an expensive item. 

Customer service: Perhaps it was my bad luck but I ended up with the rudest, most unhelpful sales assistant ever. Not sure if this is because it was at Heathrow (terminal 3) and she was sick of tourists or something but she had a chip on her shoulder, and I would certainly not have put up with her crap service if I hadn't been getting the bag tax-free. No idea why some designer SAs act like they own the brand but moving on.. 

Bag:

The style and size is pretty much the same as a Louis Vuitton Speedy 30. The main differences are that the Boston has more leather trim and the canvas is more like fabric than the Speedy canvas, making it less waterproof. I think the Speedy canvas is more durable overall.  


One of my favourite parts of the bag is actually the zip - it's excellent quality and makes the nicest sound when zipped xD


Although I have travelled with it, I have by no means used this as an everyday bag and it has already gotten some colour transfer from clothing. Boo. 


The leather has held up fairly well but there are some obvious scratches on the handle.  


It comes with a quality leather strap, but I rarely use it. 


There is a useful zipped pocket inside and two pouches for phone/keys etc; the fabric on the inside is cream, so is prone to get dirty.The bag itself is very well made and definitely feels like a luxury item. I know a lot of people are not keen on the 'in your face' monogram print but I personally love it. 

Value for money:

As the price goes up annually and I purchased it in duty-free last year, I paid less than the current online price of £700. Having used this bag for a year I do not think that it is worth £700, although I would probably be happy to pay the duty free price. 

Overall: 

Taking everything into consideration, I give this bag 7/10. I would recommend it if you can get it tax free, and you don't mind the potential for colour transfer or scratches on the leather. Despite it's drawbacks I think it's beautiful and it's still one of my favourite bags - I'm not planning to sell it any time soon!

Hope this review helped anyone thinking of getting this bag :)

Sunday, November 17, 2013

WTH has happened to hijabis on YouTube..?

People who have read my blog for a while will know that I am not particularly judgemental and I don't call people out on things in public but seriously - what on EARTH has happened to Muslim YouTubers?! 

Don't get me wrong, some of them are awesome but I cannot believe that it has become acceptable for Muslims to produce satirical videos about making the hijab 'sexy' or 'halal chat-up lines' or mocking videos about halal food or about having extramarital relations, all produced, edited and posted by Muslims. How on earth did we get to this level of acceptance towards mocking our own religion? To the point where the producers of these videos are congratulated, interviewed and loved by thousands of Muslims. Since when did it become okay and encouraged to make light of such serious topics? We as an Ummah are heading down a very slippery slope.

Once you start making light of a subject, even for a joke, it's seriousness will lessen until eventually you hold it in no regard at all. This is the way the shaytaan manipulates and deviates man and unfortunately we are making it all incredibly easy for him. 

I am not suggesting that Muslims should just get off YouTube but how about making useful videos? Not necessarily about Islam but about something that is positive or educational or comedy that is respectful and does not mock our way of life, or anyone else's. And definitely something that is not riddled with inappropriate language as I have seen on many Muslims' videos, and it looks ten times worse when hijabis do it. 

A word of advice: modesty and shyness (hayaa') are loved characteristics in Islam - they are beautiful and they beautify the person that possesses them. Please don't throw these traits away by mocking your own values for a cheap laugh. You should hold yourself and your beliefs in a much, much higher regard than that.

If you ask them, they declare: "We were only talking idly and joking." Say: "Was it at Allah, and His Ayat and His Messenger (SAW) that you were mocking?" 

[Al-Tawbah:65]

Hijab work outfit idea #2

Smart hijab

Smart hijab by stylishmuslimah

Since entering the world of work I have come to realise that the simple act of getting out of bed at 6 am after 5 hours of sleep is such a feat that putting together a remotely coordinated outfit is one of the last things I care about anymore. So I have taken to Polyvore to create virtual outfits in an attempt to make up for what I am now lacking in reality :O

Monday, November 4, 2013

It is not Al-Birr (righteousness) that you turn your faces towards the East or West (in prayers); but Al-Birr is (the quality of) the one who believes in Allah, the Last Day, the Angels, the Book, the Prophets and gives his wealth, in spite of his love for it, to the kinsfolk, to the orphans, to the poor, to the wayfarer, and to those who ask, and sets slaves free and performs As-Salat, and gives Zakat, and fulfils a covenant when he makes it, and is patient in extreme poverty and ailment and at the time of fighting. Such are the people of the truth and they are Al-Muttaqun (pious).


[Surat Al-Baqarah:177]

Sunday, November 3, 2013

Hijab work outfit idea

Hijab work outfit

Hijab work outfit by stylishmuslimah


The Givenchy bag is the latest addition to my wish list :)

Saturday, October 5, 2013

The meaning of life?

I started my training job a couple of months ago and I find it almost impossible to balance work life with 'actual' life. It is so easy to get caught up in the rat race of life that you begin to forget your purpose and things that are worthless start to matter to you while the reality of life starts to warp and disintegrate.  

I came across this amazing video on YouTube today, it's based entirely on the Quran which is what makes it so beautiful. I really needed to see something like this so I hope someone else benefits. 


Question to full-time workers - how do you balance your life so that your religion, personal relationships AND sanity are not compromised?! Is this even possible?

Friday, July 19, 2013

8 signs of weak imaan (faith)

It is incredibly easy to become complacent when it comes to faith; being able to recognise when our faith is sliding is crucial so that we can take steps to increase it. After all, our reason for living is to worship Allah (swt), be that through direct religious acts or through acts which have a positive impact on the world around us. In order to worship we must possess and maintain a strong imaan in Allah (swt).  

I did some research and have compiled a list below of things that we should look out for in our characters to make sure that our imaan is not weakening due to the everyday diversions of life. I hope it helps :)

1. Being heedless of prayers (salah)

Source

It is important that we take steps to properly concentrate during our prayers. Altogether, the 5 prayers take max 50 minutes out of a 24 hour day - Allah (swt) is not asking for much, plus it only benefits us if we concentrate.

"Behold, the hypocrites seek to deceive Allah, but it is they who are being deluded by Him. When they rise to Prayer, they rise reluctantly, and only to be seen by men. They remember Allah but little." 
[Surat Al Nisa: 142]

2. Feeling envious of others


Envy is self-destructive and a hated characteristic in all the Abrahamic religions. If you find you feel any sort of negative thought towards someone because of what they have, try and turn that into motivation to better yourself and be happy for the person. Also remember the transient reality of this world and the true meaning of happiness - it is certainly not in worldly gains. Be content with what you have by looking at the person with less than you, not more. Be genuinely happy for others when something good happens to them.

"Beware of envy because indeed envy destroys good deeds in the same manner as fire destroys wood." - Prophet Muhammed (s)

"None of you are true believers until you want for you brother that which you want for yourself." - Prophet Muhammed (s)

'Hassed' includes feeling happy when things are not going well for other people. 

3. Not feeling guilty about sinning...


This is a clear sign of someone lacking either knowledge or faith. If it is the first, that is easily rectified through reading. If the second - you need to analyse what you have been doing, saying and thinking recently in your life to be able to pinpoint the reason for this disregard to committing sin. It is often because you have been doing it regularly and so it has become normal to you. This is dangerous territory, so we must constantly analyse our actions and motives to make sure that we are not allowing the shaytan to trick us into wrong-doing.

"The greatest of sins is the one that the sinner considers to be ordinary" - Ali Ibn Abi Talib (a)

4. ...openly sinning & telling people about it

One of the mercies of Allah (swt) is allowing (and encouraging) us to conceal our sins from others and repent in private. We do not have to "confess" our sins to people and actually bragging about them is a hated thing to do in Islam.

"Allah (swt) will cover up on the Day of Resurrection the faults of the one who covers up the faults of the others in this world" 
- Prophet Muhammed (s)

There also are other hadiths that tell of a person being less likely to receive forgiveness for their sins if they openly tell people about them.

5. Being miserly :(

"Stinginess and faith do not exist together in the heart of a believer" 
- Prophet Muhammed (s)

Remember that people aren't just stingy with material things, we can be stingy with a kind word, a helping hand or simply in returning a smile.

6. Not concerning oneself with the suffering of fellow Muslims and innocent people

Self explanatory. I would say that this goes along with actually contributing to the suffering of others.

“The likeness of the believers in their mutual love, mercy and compassion is that of the body; when one part of it is in pain, the rest of the body joins it in restlessness and fever.” 
- Prophet Muhammed (s)

7. Not feeling anything when reading or hearing the Quran, or remembering Allah (swt)

Source
"Is he whose breast Allah has expanded to Islam, so he (walks) in a Light from his Lord (like the disbeliever)? Then woe to the ones whose hearts are hardened against the Remembrance of Allah! Those are in evident error." 
[Surat Al-Zumar: 22]

8. Seeing oneself as better than others

I've noticed that when some Muslims become religious they adopt this painfully snobbish holier-than-thou attitude where they believe that they are right, and anyone that may hold slightly varying opinions to them are deeply misguided and should go to hell for eternity. This is never a sign of strong faith. The Prophet (saw) was better than all of us and he did not act in this manner towards non-Muslims, let alone to people within the ummah. 

I know that these people may be enthusiastic about Islam but they should probably channel their zeal into working on bettering themselves as opposed to calling everyone out on every tiny thing that they do.

"O you who believe! Let not a group scoff at another group, it may be that the latter are better than the former; nor let (some) women scoff at other women, it may be that the latter are better than the former, nor defame one another, nor insult one another by nicknames. How bad is it, to insult one's brother after having Faith. And whosoever does not repent, then such are indeed Zalimun (wrong-doers, etc.)."

[Surat Al-Hujurat: 11]


There are many other signs but these are the ones I wanted to discuss. Hope you found it beneficial. Insha'Allah everyone is having a fulfilling Ramadan.

Wednesday, July 10, 2013

Ramadan Kareem

Just to say hope you all have a fantastic Ramadan insha'Allah with lots of reward. If you follow my instagram you'll know that I'm in Dubai at the moment visiting family which is why I haven't posted but insha'Allah I will be back on Monday :) 

Ramadan Mubarak! x

Sunday, June 23, 2013

Hijabifying a look for less

I really like the look below so I decided to re-create it to make it slightly more hijab (and day) appropriate.

Source

All items used are £30 or under :)


Sequins

Thursday, June 20, 2013

(This offer is now closed.) For one week only: 10% off everything at Aab for StylishMuslimah readers!



Aab is kindly offering all StylishMuslimah readers 10% off all sales for the next 7 days! They have an excellent range of abayas, dresses and hijabs - check them out here. Hurry though, this offer ends on Friday 28th June!


Enter code 'SM10' at the checkout :)

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Smart hijab outfit idea

I finally finished university!!!!

I wouldn't be surprised if nobody reads this blog anymore because I have been away for so long. I have been super busy with finals exams, which finally came to an end last week, alhamduli'Allah! I cannot believe that I have finally finished four years of university and that it was that long ago that I put on hijab and made a blog post about what I'm going to wear to freshers day! 

I am now off for a month and if all goes well and I pass I will be starting my pharmacy training year after that, insha'Allah. I will try to post more regularly from now on!

For now I shall leave you with some random, lovely hijab photos that  I found earlier in the SM folder. If any of them belong to you please let me know as I have totally forgotten which sites I got them from. 

This is one of my favourite hijab pictures, I was saving it to use at a more appropriate time but YOLO (joke.. JOKE!):



What awesome colour combinations:






I think high-low dresses look really nice. 



Not that hot on those jeans with boots tucked in but I just think the photo looks cool.


And some slightly classier looks to finish :)



Enjoy the rest of your day :)

Saturday, April 27, 2013

Too hot for Saudi Arabia..?

 
While 'doing coursework' I came across an article about this Emirati guy who was one of three men to be recently deported from Saudi Arabia for being so irresistibly good looking that there were fears of women being driven to distraction in their presence.
 
I think that this country has finally reached a level of stupidity in a league of its very own.
 
There are several things that sprung to mind when I read the article.
 
- One, why and when did religious police get to decide upon who is ugly enough to stay in the country?  Bit discriminatory if you ask me. Then again this is Saudi Arabia we're talking about, the land where quite literally nobody is equal. I mean, why stop at women and foreigners anyway..?
 
- Two, I wonder what the Saudis would have done with Prophet Yusef [Joseph] (as) after he made all those women cut their hands.
 
- Three, that is a very nice red shmagh.
 
- Four, I wonder if any Saudi men that were present at the time of deportation were offended because they weren't being deported as well.
 
- And finally, I should probably stop procrastinating and getting distracted by these articles.
 
So what are your thoughts on Saudi Arabia's latest moronic move?

[*EDIT* It appears that this story was over-exaggerated and the men in question were deported for actually breaking the law and acting, in a manner that would be considered in Saudi, inappropriately in a public place.]

Friday, April 19, 2013

"O you who have believed, when (the adhan)  is called for the prayer on the day of Jumu'ah  (Friday), then proceed to the remembrance of Allah and leave trade. That is better for you, if you only knew. And when the prayer has been concluded, disperse within the land and seek from the bounty of Allah, and remember Allah often so that you may succeed."

[Jumu'ah:9-10]

Sunday, April 7, 2013

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Actually WORKS: an easy way to repair dry, damaged hair with a hijab

 
I have very long, thick hair that can quickly turn dry if it is not well maintained. When I put on the hijab I discovered that it also doubles as the most effective hair conditioning mask I have ever used.  
 
A nifty trick that works a treat for dry, damaged hair:
 
In the morning brush a good amount of olive oil into dry hair, making sure you get rid of all the tangles. Plait it and then twist the plait into a bun. Wear your hijab as normal during the day and discover beautifully soft hair when you get home and take it off. It really does work, and works exceptionally well in hotter climates.
 
I also plait my hair with a small amount of olive oil before bed so it's nice and soft in the morning. This works well if you don't wear a hijab but I've found that there's something about covering the hair for a few hours that actually makes the technique work much better.
 
Hope this works for you if you're having trouble with dry hair!

Sunday, March 24, 2013

Chanel

I have wanted a Chanel flap bag for the longest time. I probably need to come to terms with the fact that I'm never going to have one and just stop including them in my outfits :'(

Thursday, March 7, 2013

My utterly superficial wishlist continued

I am curently feeling sorry for myself because I am ill in bed with a cold :( To make myself feel better I thought it'd be a good idea to make a post of all the things that I can't afford and/or am not allowed to buy.
 
Prada Saffiano. I love this leather! But it's so expensive I just can't bring myself to buying it. I was thinking though, I might ditch my pride and just buy a fake, what do you guys think? That's really cheap isn't it?
 
 
Mercedes 2012 A-Class. I would have never thought in a million years that I would even like let alone want an A-Class; I always thought the fat, ugly 1997 model and all the generations that proceeded it would go down in history for being Mercedes' biggest screwup of all time. But they have well and truly redeemed themselves with this baby and I'm not surprised either - it was designed by the same guy who designed the SLS AMG supercar... I am so in love.


A camel. No I'm not joking. I want a one-humped camel to my name, they're just so cute. I've sort of been obsessed ever since I rode one as a kid. Their milk is not too bad either. Look at the baby's face!!
 
 
Miu Miu iPad case. Yep, it is beautiful, and it probably will protect my iPad from breaking but at £380 I figured that I should give it a miss and just buy a spare backup iPad with the money instead...
And last but not least on my list:
 
 
I'd have made the list longer but I'm only half awake, in fact it's quite amazing that I'm still typing in an actual language. Anyway, my list is never-ending so I'll continue it another day. Night!

Saturday, March 2, 2013

Explained - "Top 10 Quran quotes every woman must see"


I recently came across this list of ten "controversial" quran iyat that supposedly shows how Islam oppresses women. The list is called "Top 10 quran quotes every woman must see" and contains verses that have actually been cut and also some misinterpreted. As this list has been reposted on so many sites and nobody seems to have defended them, I decided to do some research and put up an explanation to all these iyat.

10. "Your women are a tilth for you so go to your tilth as you will, and send (good deeds) before you for your souls, and fear Allah, and know that you will (one day) meet Him. Give glad tidings to believers." [Surat Al-Baqarah:223]

In the list is it made out as though this means that women are objects for men to use however they like. The reality is that this iya was sent down to clear up a specific confusion that some people had over babies coming out with squints if a couple were to conceive in a particular way (the hadith can be read here [hadith number 3363]). The iya was simply telling them that their beliefs were unfounded and a couple can conceive however they like. It is important to note that this iya is talking about conception, which is why the word "tilth" has been used: it is making reference to the sowing of seeds. I do not see it as derogatory to women, quite the opposite actually; is it not important for a farmer to put care and attention into growing his crops?


9. "Women who are divorced shall wait, keeping themselves apart, three (monthly) courses. And it is not lawful for them that they should conceal that which Allah hath created in their wombs if they are believers in Allah and the Last Day. And their husbands would do better to take them back in that case if they desire a reconciliation. And they (women) have rights similar to those (of men) over them, and men are a degree above them. Allah is Mighty, Wise." [Surat Al-Baqarah:228]

Found it funny that in the list only the bold part of the iya was mentioned and they had added the words 'in status' at the end, which isn't actually part of the iya. Anyway, onto the explanation:

The general consensus amongst scholars is that the highlighted part of the iya is basically saying two things:

1. Allah (swt) gave a husband and wife similar rights over each other in responsibility...

2. ... but He (swt) gave the man a greater degree of responsibility over the woman than that of woman over the man. It follows that the rights owned to the wife are nonnegotiable, whereas the husband has to give up certain rights.

Al-Tabari in his Tafsir narrated from Ibn `Abbas: "The daraja ('degree') mentioned by Allah (swt) here is the forfeiting, on the man's part, of some his wife's obligations towards him and his indulgence towards her, while he is fully obligated to fulfil all his obligations towards her, because the verse came right after {And they (women) have rights similar to those (of men) over them}.

"The most perfect believers are the best in conduct and best of you are those who are best to their wives." - Prophet Muhammed (s)


8. Allah directs you as regards your children's (inheritance): to the male, a portion equal to that of two females: if only daughters, two or more, their share is two-thirds of inheritance; if only one, her share is a half. For parents, a sixth share of the inheritance to each, if the deceased left children; if no children, and the parents are the (only) heirs, the mother has a third; if the deceased left brothers (or sisters) the mother has a sixth. (The distribution in all cases Is) after the payment of legacies and debts. Ye know not whether Your parents or your children are nearest to you in benefit. These are settled portions ordained by Allah; and Allah is All-knowing, All-Wise.." [Surat Al-Nisa:11]

Again, only the bold part of this iya was mentioned in the list, deliberately deceiving in my opinion.
Explanation:In Islam, the son is responsible for a family, while a daughter is taken care of by her husband and even if she does work she is not obliged to give her husband any money even though he is obliged to provide for her. For this reason, it is only fair that men would get a larger share of inheritance.
Having said this, Allah (swt) commands in Surat Al Baqarah:180 that a will should be left to conform with the specific circumstances of the deceased. For example, if the son is rich and the daughter is poor, one may leave a will giving the daughter everything, or twice as much as the son. What is explained in the iya above is a recommendation of how the money should be spilt IF a will has not been left.


7. "O you who have believed, when you contract a debt for a specified term, write it down. And let a scribe write between you in justice. Let no scribe refuse to write as Allah has taught him. So let him write and let the one who has the obligation dictate. And let him fear Allah, his Lord, and not leave anything out of it. But if the one who has the obligation is of limited understanding or weak or unable to dictate himself, then let his guardian dictate in justice. And bring to witness two witnesses from among your men. And if there are not two men, then a man and two women from those whom you accept as witnesses - so that if one of the women errs, then the other can remind her. And let not the witnesses refuse when they are called upon." [Surat Al-Baqarah:282]
 
I have discussed this iya with Muslims before and some of them explain it by saying that women are more emotional and therefore forget things more than men. I find that really patronising and undoubtedly wrong.

The Qur’an has taught that the witness of a woman is just as valid as that of a man, and made no distinction regarding the sex of a witness in every single reference except this one – granting two female witnesses in legal cases where women had little knowledge or expertise. The intention of this concession was to prevent women being tricked or cheated by unscrupulous men who could take advantage of their inexperience in business matters - in those days men heavily dominated in businesses and women were generally not involved in such things.
In every other kind of case, there is no reason why the witness of a woman should not be just as reliable as evidence as that of a man, and no distinction of either sex is made anywhere else in the Quran where witnesses are mention. E.g: "Those who accuse a chaste woman of fornication and do not produce four witnesses to support their allegation, shall be flogged with eighty lashes and their testimony shall not be accepted ever after, for they are the ones who are wicked transgressors."The text implies any four witnesses, who could be of either sex.

Ridiculous places like Saudi Arabia and their "1 male witness=2 females" have got it so, so, SO wrong.

6. And if he hath divorced her (the third time), then she is not lawful unto him thereafter until she hath wedded another husband. Then if he (the other husband) divorces her it is no sin for both of them that they come together again if they consider that they are able to observe the limits of Allah. These are the limits of Allah. He manifesteth them for people who have knowledge. [Surat Al-Baqarah:230]

I don't understand why this is supposed to be oppressive to women. It's just discouraging men from proclaiming a divorce every time they get angry, and then changing their minds once they've calmed down. Let's face it, if you remarry and divorce 3 times, you probably shouldn't be together anyway. This iya is logical, and the only person it would 'oppress' is a fickle husband.
 

5. "And [also prohibited to you are all] married women except 'ma malakat aymanukum'. This is the decree of Allah upon you. And lawful to you are [all others] beyond these, [provided] that you seek them [in marriage] with [gifts from] your property, desiring chastity, not unlawful sexual intercourse. So for whatever you enjoy [of marriage] from them, give them their due compensation as an obligation. And there is no blame upon you for what you mutually agree to beyond the obligation. Indeed, Allah is ever Knowing and Wise."
The phrase "ma malakat aymanukum", is often interpreted as "those who your right hand possess", which apparently lets men have sex with slaves outside of wedlock. I have never believed this interpretation, it goes against all logic. So what I found when doing some research into the iya was very interesting and far more logical:
Explanation:The Arabic word "aymanukum" is plural for "yameenukum", which can mean either "your right hand", or "your oath". There are are many iyas in the Quran, where this exact same word appears, and is correctly translated as meaning: 'your oath'.

Here are two examples, although there are many more:

1. "And do not make Allah the subject of your OATHS (aymanukum). Be righteous and secure and reconcile among the people; and Allah is Hearer, Knower. Allah will not call you to account for your OATHS (aymanukum); but He will call you to account for what has entered your hearts... [2:224]

2. "And do not use your OATHS (aymanukum) as a means of deception between you, that a foot will slip after it has been made firm, and you will taste the evil of turning away from the path of Allah, and you will have a great retribution" [16:94]

"Ma malakt aymanukum" in the context of this iya is thought to actually refer to believing women who are married to disbelievers and escape their husbands, seeking to marry faithful men. The faithful swear an oath to take these women under their wing, because they no longer have anyone to care for them. Technically these women are now "committed by oath". This is an example of "ma malakat aymanukum". The faithful men can marry these women provided that the woman returns the dowry to her previous husband.
The phrase does NOT mean "slaves that your right hands possess"
"And for each We have made inheritors for what was left behind by the parents and the relatives. And THOSE BOUND BY YOUR OATHS ('allazheena a'akidat aymanukum') you shall give them their portion. Allah is a witness over all things" [4:33]

The bottom line is that the ayah 4:24 is setting believing men a restriction: they are not permitted to marry certain women. Among these restricted women, are all married women except those committed to you by OATHS.

4. "If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, marry women of your choice, two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one, or 'ma malakat aymanukum', that will be more suitable, to prevent you from doing injustice." [Surat Al-Nisa:3]
 
1.Allah (swt) allowed polygamy only for helping the orphans as more women were needed to take care of the increasing number orphans from both sides after every battle. It was a real necessity of the time.
2.Men must be fair to their wives or else to never marry more than one
3. Notice how the iya starts and finishes with a reference to making sure justice is done to all those involved.
4. This law was in no way instilled for the gratification of men. It was so orphans would be provided for and looked after. Although it is legal today in Muslim countries, there is no longer a need for it like there was at the time.

3. And you will never be able to be equal between wives, even if you should strive [to do so]. So do not incline completely [towards one] and leave another hanging. And if you amend [your affairs] and fear Allah - then indeed, Allah is ever Forgiving and Merciful.
 
According to the list, this verse shows that men can, and I quote, "simply get rid of an undesirable wife". Sorry, how? All this iya does is make it even more difficult for men to take more than one wife.

2. "Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given the one more than the other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient, and guard in (their husband's) absence what Allah would have them guard. As to those women on whose part ye fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (next), refuse to share their beds, (and last) 'idribuhunna'; but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance): For Allah is Most High, great (above you all)."

This verse is often used by non-Muslims (and sometimes Muslims) to prove that Islam allows hitting of the wife as a "last resort". Muslims tend to say that the hitting must be very light, light enough not to leave a mark; some saying it should be done with a toothpick... The thought of having a husband that hit me with a toothpick as a last resort for my ill-conduct actually cracks me up. Anyway...
Explanation:The Arabic word used in verse 4:34 above is "idribuhunna", which is derived from "daraba", which means "beat". The thing with all of the Arabic words that are derived from the word "daraba" is that they don't necessarily mean "hit". The word "idribuhunna" for instance, could very well mean to "leave".
Allah (swt) used the word "darabtum", which is derived from the word "daraba" in the SAME surah to mean "go abroad" for the sake of Allah Almighty:

"O ye who believe! When ye go abroad (darabtum) In the cause of Allah, Investigate carefully, And say not to anyone Who offers you a salutation: 'Thou art none of a Believer!' Coveting the perishable good Of this life: with Allah Are profits and spoils abundant. Even thus were ye yourselves Before, till Allah conferred On you His favours: therefore Carefully investigate. For Allah is well aware Of all that ye do." [4:94]
The word is also used in another iya to mean "give" in the phrase "give an example". So "daraba" can mean "beat", "travel/leave" or "give".
I am inclined to believe that the term "daraba" in this iya means "to leave" the wife altogether. It's more logical, first you talk to her, if that doesn't work you refuse to share her bed and if that doesn't work, you leave her altogether (or hit her with a toothpick, you decide).

1. "The waiting period of those of your women who have lost all expectation of menstruation shall be three months in case you entertain any doubt; and the same shall apply to those who have not yet menstruated. As for pregnant women, their waiting period shall be until the delivery of their burden. Allah will create ease for him who fears Allah."
 
Apparently the bold part of the iya means that premenstrual girls are allowed to get married in Islam. This is a controversial subject so I'm just going to stick to the basics. The most logical interpretation of this iya is that "those who have not menstruated yet" is referring to the women that are still waiting for their period simply because it hasn't come yet; there are many different health reasons why a woman's period can be late or missed altogether. In Islam, a large part of marriage is about producing offspring, why then would Muslim men marry girls that cannot bear children? The answer is, they wouldn't.
I really hope that this was helpful and cleared up some of the many misunderstandings about women in Islam.
 
"And of His signs is that He created for you wives from among yourselves that you may find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought" [30:21]