Advice for Hijabi beginners (non-sugar-coated)

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After the African millionaires desperately throwing their life savings at me, the most common emails I get are from girls thinking about wearing hijab and wanting some advice. I'm not going to beat about the bush, I am the worst person to ask for advice when it comes to anything, let alone a religious subject. My opinions regarding hijab have definitely changed over the past few years and of course, I am not a scholar so my views are often riddled with bias and influenced by my state of mind at any given time. Having said that, as so many people have asked, I decided I should make a post giving anyone thinking of wearing hijab a few pieces of advice, things I kind of wish someone had told me.

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1. Wouldn't advise you to overhaul your wardrobe the minute you start covering your hair. I did that and it didn't go well - take your clothing transition slowly.

2. It is a piece of cloth, not magic: don't expect to suddenly become divinely religious. Please don't act it either, it's so off-putting.

3. One of the biggest shocks I got when I began to mix with Muslims was realising just how bitchy a lot of hijabis can be. Some are nice, but don't expect to suddenly discover a "sisterhood" that you weren't part of before you wore hijab. You weren't part of it because nobody is. It doesn't exist.

4. Keep reminding yourself that you are wearing it for the pleasure of Allah (SWT) and not for people.

5. Hijab is not about 'modesty', it's about doing what Allah (SWT) commands you to do. You can be modest without covering your hair and you can be immodest in a niqaab.

6. Be prepared for some interesting questions/comments. Some recent ones I've had (from non-Muslim men) include 'are you wearing a wig under that?', 'I bet you don't wear that to the beach.. you don't do you?', 'how long is your hair and have you dyed it?' and 'what would happen if I pulled the end of your.. headpiece?' HEADPIECE.

7. Be confident! It doesn't matter how you dress as long as you are confident and nice, people will like and respect you. And if they don't, it's not your problem.

8. Be cautious of judging the way other Muslim girls dress and act. It has nothing to do with you. Anyway, they might actually be much better than you.

9. Once it's on  you become a walking representation of Islam (like it or not), which is a huge responsibility, especially if you turn into one of those hijabis that find it impossible to smile.

10. I beg you don't start dissing advising hijabis on the Internet about how 'haram' they are and telling them how they should and should not be dressing. People did this with me a lot at the start of my blog when I did not wear the hijab and it almost put me off the idea altogether.

11. Allah (SWT) judges our scales of good deeds in relation to our bad deeds. Hijab will increase your good deeds but it is not the be all and end all of your deen. Just another good thing to do.

12. You will probably, at some point after wearing the hijab, want to take it off. I would strongly advise you to stick with it simply because if you do there will come a moment when you think 'I'm really glad I didn't take it off'. 'Jihad al nafs' was never supposed to be easy, so don't instantly succumb to your inner desires - they are almost always fleeting.

13. I wouldn't even think about hijab if I didn't pray and fast.

The tips are just my opinions and based on my experiences so they may not apply to you but I hope at least some of them helped :)

A Christian Hijabi Goth

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Never thought I'd write those words in the same sentence.. Actually, when I thought I'd seen it all in the hijab world I came across this very interesting video about a Christian goth explaining why she wears the hijab.

Well that's me subscribed! Check out her other videos here.

When & Why I Started Wearing Hijab

I thought that as I have posted other people's hijab stories I should write mine, as part of the hijabi beginner posts.

I really hope that upon reading it you don't judge some of my decisions in the wrong way - haram or halal, whatever I did in terms of hijab felt like the right thing to do at the time.

I think I should start with a slightly difficult confession. And that is, for the first half of the period that I owned and wrote this blog, giving people advice on how to and how not to wear their hijabs, I didn't wear it myself. I started this blog in September 2008 but did not step out of the house attired in hijab until Eid of September 2009. This post was the first that I ever wrote during which I actually wore the hijab; I remember even now how happy I felt that I could finally post about my style - before then, I would never mention my own clothing or "my hijab", I simply allowed people to assume the apparently obvious.

I would not blame you at this point for thinking that I am a hypocrite, after all why should somebody who doesn't do something themselves dish out advice to people on how to do that very same thing? Well, I will try to explain my reasoning behind the blog and to do that I will need to take you back a few years...

I grew up in a very "white" area. All of my friends, neighbours and teachers were English and I was completely closed off from Muslims for most of my life. Although growing up I never ate non-halal food and I fasted in Ramadan, I didn't give Islam much thought, I was just the normal token foreign kid who pretended to celebrate Christmas.. :(

I remember when I was 9 my dad asking me when I am going to wear the headscarf, not wanting to disappoint I said I would when I started secondary school (aged 11). This, however came and went and I was relieved that he didn't bring it up again for a while.

At 12 years old, I travelled with my family to do Umrah for the first, unforgettable time. There are two things about that trip that I cannot forget - one, the overwhelming and unexplainable feeling of fear I got the day before we headed out and two, the beautiful sense of calmness I got the very first time I set my eyes on the Ka'ba. I have been to Makkah many times since then but I have not experienced those two feelings to the extent I did the first time. It was then that my interest first grew in Islam, I remember coming back declaring that from now on I was going to pray everyday.

That lasted a week.

From then on we started going nearly every year and I loved every trip. The only thing I hated about the Umrahs was coming back, for two reasons. One, is the obvious and two, is that I hated the guilt I got when the airplane touched down in Heathrow and I would slip of my headscarf and abaya to reveal jeans and a top. Oh my dad's face..

Throughout secondary school, I never admitted that I was Muslim even though I avoided the main haram things. I didn't want people to make fun of me - I remember back then, getting called an "Arab" was considered offensive, hence I laid low.

There was one girl in the year above me who one day came in with a headscarf on. She was 14 and the only one in the entire school. It's strange but even though I am a Muslim myself, I automatically looked at her in a different way, like she was suddenly so much more "foreign" than she had been before. I avoided her.

I can't remember the exact age at which I started praying - I think it was 15 or 16. I do remember, however, that it was around this time that I started feeling very guilty about not wearing hijab. Nevertheless, I put this to the back of my mind when I met the one and only girl who wore a headscarf in my secondary school, at college. She had taken it off after two years telling me that she found it too difficult. I felt better at somebody elses short coming in something I found so difficult to do that I started college at 16 and soon became a fashion-obsessed student.

Although I didn't wear a headscarf in college, I did cover everything but my hands, face and hair. You wouldn't have caught me in shorts but you wouldn't have caught me in wide leg jeans either. I also prayed, I never admitted it though. I remember once some Indian guy in Biology started making a joke about how hilarious it would be if I "prayed on a mat". I point blank denied it.

..I went home that day and prayed.. on a mat.

In the meantime, whenever we would go to Makkah I would renew my faith in Islam and Allah (SWT). I made a pact with myself that I would wear the hijab when I started university. No ifs or buts this time: I was determined to do it.

You may ask at this point that if I wanted to wear it so badly why didn't I just go for it? The answer is, I don't know, I just couldn't. I was too scared of what people would think. Thinking back now I squirm, but I remember I was even uncomfortable going out with my own mum because of what people might say about her hijab.

Anyway, 2 years of college came and went and I decided that I wasn't ready for university yet, so I deferred my entry and worked for a year. I reasoned with myself that my pact had not taken age into consideration - I was to wear it when I went to university. After all, my dress had greatly improved, I prayed, fasted, read the Quran, increased my knowledge in Islam (and hijab) and avoided haram. I would spend another year hijab-less.

It was at the start of this gap year and during Ramadan that I started the blog. I had been making hijab outfits on Polyvore, thinking about what I would wear when I became a 'hijabi'. I started buying really modest clothing and saving them for university. I couldn't wait to be a proper hijabi. The blog started as a way to showcase my Polyvore looks, no more no less. But then I got really into it and thought why can't I give people advice? I had read and researched plenty about the hijab and I loved fashion so I didn't see why I couldn't write about it just because I didn't wear a headscarf, I figured that I adhered to hijab in other ways.

Sometimes I considered telling my readers the truth, but I thought that if I did they would stop reading and think I was a fraud, as well as this I had started getting messages from people saying that reading my blog had made it easier for them to wear the hijab so I thought why ruin it?

It's funny because during that particular Ramadan my dad told me to wear a headscarf while I was fasting. I cringed, I loathed it. I would wear it when he was there only and would take it off in the car before we even got home. I so wanted to wear it, but not on somebody elses terms and not at that time or place.

Fast forward a year and we finally moved to an area with a slightly more mixed population. It was two weeks before I started university and the end of Ramadan '09. We decided to go out for Eid and I knew we would be going to the mosque as well. At 19, I decided there and then that that was the right time. I remember my exact outfit - a cream mac, wide leg jeans and a red headscarf. I said nothing, I just went downstairs like normal. It was the weirdest, happiest feeling. I had finally done it.

Almost 2 years later and I don't regret my decision one bit. It's odd how as you get older other people's opinions of you don't matter as much - I didn't care what people thought anymore. I am glad I didn't put it on sooner and I'm glad I didn't keep putting it off either.

Perhaps I did "long it out" more than necessary but I think if I hadn't, I would have probably just taken it off after a while.

My advice to anyone thinking of hijab is don't just use either your heart or your head. Use your logic and reasoning and research to be sure in your mind that the hijab is a mandatory requirement in Islam. If after this you still really don't want to wear it, focus on your other aspects of your religion for a while (especially prayer). I'm not encouraging people not to wear it, just not to wear it and then take it off due to weak Eman or knowledge.

Hijabi Beginner: Is The Hijab REALLY Required?

A non-hijabi Muslimah recently wrote to me because she is not convinced that the hijab is a requirement in Islam. She asked me to put forward the Islamic evidences of hijab. In this post I will try my best to do just that using Quranic iyas and authentic ahadith. 

1. Surat Al Nur: 

- Bism'Allah Al Rahmaan Al Raheem -

"And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and be protect their private parts, and not to display of their zeenah except that which is apparent, and to draw their headcovers over their juyub, and not to reveal their zeenah save to their own husbands or fathers or husbands' fathers, or their sons or their husbands' sons, or their brothers or their brothers' sons or sisters' sons, or their women, or their slaves, or male attendants who lack vigour, or children who know naught of women's nakedness. And let them not stamp their feet so as to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And turn unto Allah together, O believers, in order that ye may succeed." [24:31]

- "..and not to display of their zeenah except that which is apparent" i.e. they should not show anything of their zeenah to a non-Mahram man, except for whatever it is apparent (clear, impossible to hide..) - most scholars agree that this refers to the hands and face...


- ...however, slight differences have arisen amongst the scholars concerning the precise meaning of ...except only that which is apparent... from Surat Al Nur which according to Ibn `Abaas (RAA), includes "the face, the two hands, and rings. This view is shared by Ibn `Umar, `Ata'a, and others from the Tabi'een." [Tafseer Ibn Kathir]. Imam Ash-Showkani states that it includes: "The dress, the face, and the two hands"; Ibn `Abaas and Qatadah have stated: "The adornments include eye shadow (i.e., Kuhul), bracelets, hand dye, and rings, and it is permissible for women to (uncover) them." [Fateh Al-Qadeer]

- 'Zeenah' (adornment) means 2 things: natural beauty and physical adornments e.g. makeup, jewelry etc

- "..draw their headcovers over their juyub.." The women used to cover their hair but leave their necks and bosoms uncovered. This iya makes it clear that women should cover their 'juyub' - which most agree refers to the neck and chest area (and some say includes the ribs) - with a head covering. I know that some Muslims use this iya to back their opinion that Islam only requires women to cover their breasts, however, why would Allah (SWT) have mentioned the 'khimaar' (a headcover) when telling these women to cover? The Quran is timeless and applies to nations at any time, if the headcover was simply cultural it would not have been mentioned at all.

2. Surat Al Ahzaab:

"O Prophet, tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to draw their outer garments about themselves (when they go out). That is better so that they may be recognised and not harassed. And Allah is Forgiving, Merciful." [Al-Ahzaab, 33:59]

- Abu Dawood related that Aishah (R) said: "After this Aayah was revealed the women of the Ansar appeared like crows." (because of the color and shape of the cloaks they wore).

- "..to be recognised.." i.e. as Muslim women (would modest clothing alone allow people to recognise you as a Muslim woman?)

3. Ahadith

There are other ahadith on the hijab but these are the ones I have picked to post:

- Aishah (R) said: "May Allah bestow His Mercy on the first Muhajirat (emigrants). When Allah revealed:...and draw their headcovers over their necks and bosoms... they tore material and covered themselves with it." [Al-Bukhari]

- Usamah ibn Zaid said: Allah's Messenger (S) gave me a gift of thick Coptic cloth he had received as a gift from Dahiah Al-Kalbi, and so I gave it to my wife. Thereafter the Prophet (S) asked me: Why didn't you wear the Coptic cloth? I replied: I gave it to my wife. The Prophet (S) then said: Tell her to wear a thick gown under it for I fear that it may describe the size of her limbs. [Narrated by Ahmad, Al-Bayhaqi, and Al-Haakim]

- Narrated by Aishah: Allah's Apostle used to offer the Fajr prayer and some believing women covered with their veiling sheets used to attend the Fajr prayer with him and then they would return to their homes unrecognized. [Bukhari]

- The Prophet (S) said: There will be in the last of my Ummah (nation of believers), scantily dressed women, the hair on the top of their heads like a camel's hump. Curse them, for verily they are cursed. In another version he said: ...scantily dressed women, who go astray and make others go astray; they will not enter Paradise nor smell its fragrance, although it can be smelled from afar. [At-Tabarani and Sahih Muslim]

Also keep in mind that the concept of 'hijab' is not an Islamic one but a command from Allah (SWT) to the Jews, Christians and the all of the monotheistic religions before that. It has only been recently that the question of the obligation of hijab has been risen amongst the Muslim ummah, before it was accepted and expected.

I hope that has cleared up your doubts, if not, perhaps you should focus on some other part of your religion and I am pretty sure you will want to adopt the hijab sooner or later, Insha'Allah :)

Hijabi Beginner: What IS Hijab?

I will admit that this video made me feel a bit bad. I guess it is so easy to get caught up in the trials of this life that everybody needs a reminder from time to time.

P.S. Please keep the Libyans and all the other Muslims living under oppressive tyrants in your prayers :)

Hijabi Beginner: Iqraa

As part of the Hijabi Beginner posts, I interviewed a new hijabi to find out why she decided to adopt the hijab at the tender age of 13 (awwwww!).. Sorryy, but I think I'm fast approaching the age at which I am allowed to be patronising, yaayyy :o)

Here's as little about her...

"Hey, my name is Iqraa Shahid and I live in Cumbernauld, Scotland, which is in the UK. I was born on the 16/02/97 so that makes me thirteen years old (A). I am halfway through my third year in high school and this is usually the point where the exams start, eeeeeek :S!!!! I started wearing the hijab last year, after the summer and although I found it hard and it did come with its rough times, I am just so glad I went through with it and to be honest it is one of the best things I have ever done and I don't regret a single thing :D"

1: You're quite young, how do you know it's the right time to adopt the Hijab?

To be honest, there isn't really a right time to adopt the hijab. It is a hard thing to do and most people would try and put it off as much as they can. Some people grow up wearing it and have started from a very young age so don't see life any different. In my case it was different. I've always known that my mum wanted me to wear it and would eventually make but I tried putting it off for two years but I finally did it! The reasons for putting it off wasn't really because I didn't want to wear it, it was more to do with the fear I felt, which is usually what people feel when the topic of hijab comes in their lives. I knew that someday I am going to have to wear it and the more I put it off the harder it will be for me and I realised that it will just burden me until i eventually decide to wear it and masha'Allah I did and I am glad i did it during Ramadan :D

2: Truthfully, would you say that anybody had an influence on you making the decision?

Well, my mum really wanted me to wear it and things where tough between us because it was hard for her to see me not wearing it and receiving wrong attention and she feared that I would end up going on the wrong path. When I realised this, it really upset me because I knew that if I didn't wear it, the relationship between me and my mum wouldn't be as close as it was because she would be too busy trying to control me so I don't go off and do wrong things and I would be annoyed by her controlling so it would just be a whole lot of trouble. But then I realised that if I did wear it, my mum would be happy and step back and give me more freedom and respect. So yeah, she really did influence my decision.

3: How did your family react to your decision?

My mum of course was over the moon. My brothers and sisters where just happy but really didn't see the difference in me and didn't see what a huge decision it was. My dad was fine with it but he doesn't really take much things seriously so he never saw the big deal in it either, he was just glad that I was being a good Muslim I guess lol oh God that sounds so corny lol. My gran was happy since I'm the first (hopefully not the last) grandchild to wear it and my granddad who I don't see much because he isn't very well, didn't see a difference and if he did kept it to himself but I would imagine he too was very happy. My two aunts, one who does wear the hijab and one that doesn't wear really happy, the one that didn't brought me scarves and stuff and the one that does was really happy but upset because her daughters don't wear it so I understand that it hurts her to her niece wearing it when her own girls don't.

4: What was your first day like? Did people treat you differently?

The first day I wore it was the day I was going back to school after summer. Everyone was fine with it and only a few questioned me about it. But because I wasn't completely happy I kept thinking people where giving me looks and stuff but I realise now that it was all in my head and nobody really cares if I wear it or not, to them I'm still iqraa. It was really hard for me when I first wore the hijab and I went through some really rough patches and did try to blame it all on the hijab. I hadn't yet fully accepted it but now I am fine and love wearing it, yeah I do have days when i think "urghh I wish I didn't have to put this on all the blummin time" but then again, I have those days where I look in the mirror and smile back at the reflection and think this is perfect for me :D

5: What is the best thing about Hijab?

Hmmm I would say....being different (In a good way) lol. Not just like the usual teenage girl you would typically get, but someone unique, someone that will be remembered in a good way. Also not having to do my hair all the time when I go out but then again, it takes me ages getting my hijab right before I go out lol :L

6: What would you say is the worst thing about Hijab?

I'm the type of person that has to have everything in order and perfect! I can't go out without looking decent or without any makeup! I hate it when the hijab doesn't sit right, it bugs me off and I sit and have a screaming tantrum at myself for ages until I can finally get it right lol. So with hijab I hate it when it doesn't go the way I want it to!

7: Do you feel that it's has brought you closer to Allah (SWT)?

Yes I do, Hijab is about everything not just a scarf worn on your head. It's about your behaviour, attitude etc. When your walking in the street and you see a woman who wears a hijab and she has a growl on her face, it puts you right off, but when you see a hijabi with a lovely smile, greeting everyone and that, it makes you attracted and you think "wow she's a nice woman". This type of Muslim attracts people to Islam and makes them think what a lovely religion it is. Now when I go out I always think this and smile all the time cos it makes me think "this is the way I should be flaunting my religion", it is our job to welcome people to Islam and for them to see what a lovely religion it really is!

8: If a girl wants to start wearing the hijab, what would your advise be to her?

Wow, I have a lot of answers for this one lol.

I think a woman should wear the hijab when she is personally ready, but for some people this works but for others they think "what if I am never ready?". But for the people that question, well they should think of the reasons why they are putting it off? It is probably somewhere along the lines of being scared of what others think or the fear of being out casted. Trust me this doesn't happen, In fact you get more respect for wearing the hijab. Men respect women more when they wear the hijab. These women are like diamonds, they need to handled with care.

When you wear the hijab you shouldn't be doing it for anyone else but for yourself and your relationship with Allah (swt). The hijab is something that once you take on, it's something that sticks with you throughout your life and it makes you who you are. It's an amazing feeling to walk out wearing the hijab and knowing that each time you're wearing the hijab you are getting closer to Allah (swt) and to heaven.

9: And finally, what do you think of women who don't adopt the Hijab? Is it right to judge them?

I don't think you should judge anyone but yourself. Some women just aren't ready to wear the hijab and I think that this should be respected. It is between them and Allah (swt) and it should remain that way. It really depends on someone's faith and the type of Muslim they are.

If you would like to tell your hijab story, email me :)

Hijabi Beginner: Revert Jan's First Day In Hijab

Hijabi Beginner: 5 Cons Of Hijab

I wrote a 5 Pros Of Hijab post a while back so I thought it was only fair to make a post on the cons too. This is so that you know what you are getting yourself into before you decide to put it on making you less likely to take it off later. And by 'it' I mean the headscarf as Hijab is not a cloth you can simply wear and in essence, is something that is applied to both sexes. So here goes:

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1. Finding what clothes your are comfortable with can be a bit of a predicament at the start: Although most women who get to the point of wanting to wear the headscarf will be dressed pretty modestly already, some are not (including myself in that). I found it very hard when I first started wearing the scarf, to decide what 'sort' of hijabi I wanted to be. Abaya? Skirt? Jeans? Leggings..?! I tried them all and in the end settled for the middle (jeans/skirt). I would defiantly recommend you get that nailed and read on it thoroughly before covering your hair. Oh, and doooon't let any old person influence your decision - I did this and it led nowhere. In the end I realised that everyone has had different experiences, you just have to do what you feel is right.

2. 'Muslim' men.. The Quran explicitly and categorically commands men to lower their gaze and guard their chastity before it tells women to lower their gazes and cover. Paradoxically, I have found it is non Muslim men that fulfil this requirement by not 'checking out' hijabis or modestly dressed women and Muslim men that don't. Okay, firstly and obviously, they are not all like this so I am not making a sweeping generalisation but talking from experience. Secondly, this is never eeever a good thing nor should it be flattering - they look at anything that moves, it's really repulsive actually.

*Translation: "Nothing grabbed his attention.. except a french abaya.." - I'm pretty sure this is right but my Arabic reading isn't amazing so could somebody verify?

3. Shopping: Yes, that cute, pink 3/4 length sleeved dress will need to be bought with a perhaps not so cute long sleeved stretch top in future.. sorryy. And cardigans are pretty much a must but, of course, that's only a problem if you're not hot on them and who's not hot on cardigans?!
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4. Bad Bun Days.. :S Basically the equivalent of a bad hair day. I had one on Friday, it was like a deflated souffle at the back of my neck which was really annoying and itchy.

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5. Headphones: Omg, a nightmare to put on in public. It does depends on the style you are wearing and I think the most un-headphone-friendly hijab style has to be the Turkish wrap where you make a knot around the neck..

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Soo that's pretty much it for me, hope it was helpful and doesn't put you off too much :S Oh, of course, there's the whole terrorist bomb thing blah blah blah.. but just as long as you don't wear a back pack (who would anyway?!) on a train/tube/bus and don't have a suspiciously large bun you should be alright..

Hijabi Beginner: Having Doubts?

When you realise that you should be adhering to the laws of hijab (and if you are a practising Muslimah, you will sooner or later, Insha'Allah), you can suddenly find a million questions and contradictions to prevent you from wearing it and we all know who that's from.. If you are currently in this predicament, then this video that I found on you tube might make things seem simpler, afterall the concept of hijab is a very simple one but it's choosing to follow it that's the hurdle:

Hijabi Beginner: Work Wear Request

Modest, non-hijabi/hijabi in training Nafessa has asked me to make a post on work and smart wear as she has a job interview next week. Although she doesn't wear hijab at the moment, she would like to wear it in the future, Insha'Allah, and is very conscious about dressing modestly first.

Now, Nafessa I have made this outfit especially for you but I am not going to make a whole post about smart dress because I have done so many smart hijab fashion articles before so check out the links at the end of this post of previous stuff in the blog!

In this outfit, the shirt is a tunic and the trousers are a wide-leg cut; left open, the cardigan will drape over and cover your figure without making you look swamped. I have added a scarf so that you have the option of completing your look with a smart Turkish style hijab.

Smart Wear by Zaenab

Here are some other posts I have done that you might find useful:

How To Do Smart

A Smart Choice

The Perfect Combination For A Formal Look

I hope that helps Nafeesa and best of luck with your interview, you'll walk it, Insha'Allah!

Hijabi Beginner: 5 Pros Of Hijab

As part of my 'Hijabi Beginner' posts, I decided to make a list of five of what I think are the main reasons a Muslimah should wear the hijab. When you are thinking about wearing it, so many things go around in your head so I hope the list makes it that bit easier to decide.

Before reading it, remember that the word 'hijab' in Arabic means 'barrier' not 'headscarf' or 'modest dress'. A barrier is something built not something that pops up automatically when you cover your hair with some material. So before you even think about covering your hair, make sure the foundations for a proper hijab are already in place in your life by the way you act, talk and dress especially around men.

1. Simply and most importantly because has Allah (SWT) ordered us to wear the hijab and to cover up. If you believe in Allah (SWT), you pray and do good deeds and wish to obey Him (SWT) then sooner or later you will feel the urge to wear hijab. If you don’t feel like this at all, you should focus on other, more fundamental parts of Islam like reading the Quran, prayer and even things like questioning the sort of effect the people you socialise with have on you and the way you act.

“And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and be modest, and to display of their adornment only that which is apparent, and to draw their veils (head coverings) over their bosoms, and not to reveal their adornment accept to their own husbands or fathers or husbands' fathers, or their sons or their husbands' sons, or their brothers or their brothers' sons or sisters' sons, or women, or their slaves, or male attendants who lack vigour, or children who know naught of women's nakedness. And let them not stamp their feet so as to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And turn unto Allah together, O believers, in order that ye may succeed.”
[Al Nur: 30]

Note what is mentioned first in the Iya: the lowering of the gaze and acting modestly or the covering of the breasts?

2. Dressing modestly in a world where women (and men!) are sexualized a lot will get you more respect from people who may have otherwise just ‘checked you out’ treating you, consciously or subconsciously, as a commodity.

3. Although a daunting thought and often a deterrent for a women wishing to wear hijab in the Western world, people will automatically know that you are a Muslim. This doesn’t have to be a bad thing though! If you are a walking representation of your religion then show it in a good light by the way you act and deal with people; if you change just one person’s bad opinion of Islam the jobs a good’n!

4. Only the people you want to see your Awrah will see it, when your outfit leaves only little to the imagination get back to the drawing board, love. On a slightly more serious note, if your outfits really do lend an eyeful and you want to dress more Islamically, start by de-cluttering your wardrobe of the most revealing items you have and then focus on covering your breasts, waist, hips and then move onto longer sleeves and covering the thighs. You’ll be several steps closer to hijab :)

5. People judge you by your intellect, opinions and achievements instead of your quickly perishable looks and you’re conforming by attempting to replicate unreasonable beauty stereotypes seen in the media.

I could go on and on but remember, the most important reason is because we are told to do so by our Creator who knows us better than we know ourselves and so knows what is good for us and what isn’t (SWT). I’m not saying that the next time you go out you must be covered from head to toe, that’s ridiculous. Islam came to humans in small chunks at a time so they could take it in and adapt their lives easily and over a long period. This is what a Muslimah wanting to be a Hijabi should do, adapt her lifestyle and clothing to be suited to Islam and Hijab only then should she cover her hair. Hope this helps any budding hijabis! More coming soon Isha'Allah :D

Hijabi Beginner: Style Trial

If you are thinking about becoming a hijabi but don't know where to start, my advise would be start with your clothing by gradually making them looser and longer. Funnily enough, this post isn't about clothing, it's about the headscarf. Converting to more modest clothes is one thing but as soon as you wrap a scarf around your hair instead of you neck, you automatically define yourself as a Muslim and this can be a very daunting experience in the Western world.

The thing you have to remember is that Islam and the Quran were revealed to the Prophet (SAW) and his people in small chunks over time, if it had come down all at once, it would have been too much for any of them to digest. It's exactly the same with wearing hijab, you need to do it gradually and over time otherwise you will just bite off more than you can chew and then just turn off to the idea altogether.

If you haven't covered your hair before and want to give it a go, here is a style that I suggest, it is far more discrete than a shayla or amira style and is kind of a 'hijabi half way house':

Here are the steps:

And this is what it should look like:

If you are confortable with this, you could start wearing it with a polo neck top or wrap another scarf around your neck in the winter.

The Hijabi Beginner

If you live in a western country, even the prospect of covering your hair is scary for most. By wearing the headscarf, you are identifying yourself as a Muslim and we all know the general portrayal of Muslims in the media is usually negative, but that's another story..

Anyway, the difficulties that young Muslimahs face in the western world can sometimes leave them feeling isolated especially in certain aspects where they find it hard to explain to their parents just how they feel because their mother and father have a completely different social upbringing to them and have faced very different challenges as young adults so they can't quite relate to their all of their childrens worries. The main point is pressures from school, family and culture are enough without throwing hijab and religion into the equation so I have decided to dedicate a section for the new hijabi or the Muslimah thinking of becoming a hijabi, or on the road to becoming a hijabi. I hope that it might make dressing modestly easier for the Muslimah living in the western world.

The first post is about 2 teenage girls living in the west, one wears hijab and the other doesn't. Here's their stories, they are long but interesting reads. It was written by Robyn Doolittle for the star.com:

ASMAA ABOU ZEIDAN

Asmaa Abou Zeidan scans through her closet and – like most mornings – settles on a shirt her mother doesn't like.
It's a white linen button-up blouse, falling just above the knee.
"She thinks it's too tight," the 16-year-old sighs. "She thinks everything I own is too tight. `That's not the way a Muslim girl is supposed to dress. You're supposed to be modest,'" she says.
Asmaa doesn't consider herself super-religious. She reads the Qur'an – when her parents ask her to. She attends mosque, prays five times a day, and believes in Islam, but right now Asmaa's priorities are her family, friends and being 16.
On a typical day, Asmaa likes to hang around school for a bit after the final 3:15 p.m. bell. Sometimes, she and some friends will hop the 43 bus to the Scarborough Town Centre for some shopping.
"I don't have to be home until dark, although in the winter that's pretty early," she says. "My parents are pretty lenient with things like this. I can hang out with my friends as long as my mom knows where I am."That said, Asmaa lives a life of clear limits. She's never had a sleepover at a friend's house. She's not allowed to have a boyfriend and any secret crushes have to stay that way.
Well-liked at school, and as happy as a 16-year-old can be, Asmaa wears the hijab – by choice. It's a decision she made at 12, late by some standards.
"I liked the way people treated me when I wore it. I get more respect," says the Winston Churchill Collegiate student. "And I like the way it looks." Asmaa skims through her 25 or so scarves, selecting a chequered black and white one, with a pearl pin she bought at an Islamic clothing store down the street. In 30 seconds, she's wrapped it around her shoulder-length black hair.
"My hair's just black right now. But a few months ago I had it dyed red with highlights," she says, her soft eyes beaming. She laughs, anticipating the next question. But who's going to see it?
"What? I'm still a girl," she laughs. "My friends see it sometimes."
She means either at home, when no men are around, or in fitness class. "It's just girls, so when they close the gym doors, sometimes I take off my hijab," she says.
But sometimes, she just lets her hair down. Late at night, Asmaa will sneak down to her building's pool for a swim. Her bathing suit goes all the way to her ankles and wrists. She wears a cap on her head. Only when she's sure no one will walk in, Asmaa takes off the cap to feel the water run through her hair.

ZAHRAA EL-ZAIBAK

Most days, Zahraa El-Zaibak and her friends congregate outside the main school entrance after the final 3:15 p.m. bell.
Kids from other cliques stop to chat. A grade 11 student in conversation with Zahraa's friend Asmaa stops mid-sentence, looking over at Zahraa. He makes a face.
"Are you Muslim?" he asks
"Yes," the 15-year-old replies, with a hint of annoyance.
"Then why don't you wear the scarf?"
Let's just say Zahraa's heard that before.
In typical teenage fashion, clothing is a pillar of Zahraa's teenage life. On this day, Zahraa's wearing a brown crushed velvet track jacket over some loose-fitting blue jeans. It's a modest ensemble compared to what the average, low-rise-jean-wearing high schooler might wear. But by traditional Muslim standards the jacket's too short.
And the jacket's zipper is only half done up, revealing a not-so-baggy tank top that scoops a few millimetres too low below the collarbone.
But it's the one thing she doesn't wear that always creates questions.
"It happens all the time and I'm sick of hearing it," she says, in a severe tone.
"People think that if you don't wear the hijab you're not religious. They look on the outside. If you're wearing the hijab then you're automatically religious, instead of getting to know a person and see what they're really like."
Zahraa is "the sweetest girl you'll ever meet," according to her two best friends. But discussing the hijab brings out an uncharacteristic passion.
A scarf is not the only indicator of your spirituality, she says. She's learning how to read and write Arabic, so she can study the Qur'an, prays, attends mosque, fasts during Ramadan and says she thinks about faith and religion and what they mean to her.
"It's not that I won't wear one," she says about the hijab. "I'm just not ready for it yet. I will wear it one day. I know that. Just not right now. For me, I want to be spiritually ready to do it and not regret it later. It really changes everything."
She knows she's treated differently than Asmaa, her best friend, who does wear the hijab.
"They think you're more – I can't think of the word – traditional."
For one, it would change how she dressed every day. Like many 15-year-olds, she wants to be able to wear what she likes.
As it is now, Zahraa gets up a bit earlier than the rest of her friends. She has to.
Her voluminous shoulder-length hair takes at least half an hour to tame. After a shower and quick blow dry, Zahraa reaches for a can of mousse and works it through the curls, crunching her hands into fists.
The last thing she does before she meets the morning is pull her dark brown bangs back with a pair of bobby pins.

More posts coming soon Insha'Allah, I hope you like the idea :D